Which then led to this internal dialogue between my Id and my Superego:
Id: "Oooh! I wanna see! I wanna look!"
Superego: "Not a good idea. Not a good idea at ALL! I forbid it!"
Id: "Not fair! Why do you always get to be in charge?"
Superego: "Because when you're in charge, you tend to set things on fire, or pee in inappropriate places."
Id: "Whatever. I hate you."
Superego: "I know you do. But I'm in charge."
Id: "You're not the boss of me!"
Superego: "Actually, I am. I'm the Superego. I am rational, impartial and without bias. And I am sooo the boss of you."
Just then, the Ego joined in: "Oh, come ON, how disturbing could they REALLY be? I say let her look. We have to let her make her own decisions someday."
Superego: "Harump! I'm going to read the paper and smoke my pipe. Don't say I didn't warn you."
It's like my fingers had a mind of their own, and before I knew it, I was even more grossed out than the time my daughter pooped all over me when we were buying a car. Now I truly want to throw up. Then I want to set myself on fire, so I can be distracted from thinking about the vileness I have seen.
I'm way too impulsive, entirely too distractible,and utterly lacking the ability to picture the consequences of my actions before I act. I really shouldn't be allowed to make decisions that could cause nausea, trauma, fear or diarrhea. I need a handler, someone I can run my ideas by before I'm allowed to act on them. And I want an internet do-over. I know it's not possible, but I'm still asking. What really pisses me off is the fact that I'm smart enough to know it would have a 99.99% chance of ending badly, BUT I DID IT ANYWAY. So I'm going to make a rule for myself. If a link has the words: nasty, food, poop, disturbing, sickening, vile or shocking, or if it involves clowns or mimes, I'm not going there. I'm just not.